Answer is: You start walking

Question is: What you do when the fat gets a flat! Wednesday afternoon, the weather is nice and I need to get out. Go fishing or go for a ride. Heck, I'll ride to Tranquility and make it home by dark. Everyone was busy so I rode by myself. Bumped into DMars and rode about 1/2 of Tranquility with him. I was doing great, nine miles into my ride and legs and lungs were feeling great. You can just tell its gonna be a good ride

flat and you can see the nubbin sticking out

Until we stopped to talk to his sister. I hear this wsshhhhh...Umm I think I have a flat. Yup, there goes all the air. Must be a flat. Patch kit? Nope. Tube? Nope. Cell phone? Nope. Car in the parking lot? Nope. You know where this is going.

The backside of the culprit. Pretty pointy.

Yikes! 

We had just exited the Fort Street section of pine trees. What to do...what to do. Walk home or walk to Bike Masters? There was clearly something large sticking out of my rear Endo. I have an inner tube at home but its not doing me any good on the trail. Eh. I'll walk it. It can't be too far...

Well it was. Cleats on and pushing a bike where the humongous sidewall is just scraping everying it comes in contact with on the bike. Out of Tranquility. Into Standing Bear. Two miles of walking done. Whoa, I'm pushing this thing at 2.8 miles per hour. Only about 2 more hours until I get home! Then I saw Dave N and Brian at the 132nd street entrance of Standing Bear. Talked for a bit, I'll keep walking. I need to learn a lesson and want a good story about how I walked the walk. Usually "Walking the walk" involves a crazy night of drunkeness and trying to walk home or to taco bell or something insanely stupid. But this time, no alcohol was involved.

Get all the way to the other side of Standing Bear. Man it a long walk from one end to the other. Get stopped by some fishermen and we talk bikes and fishing for about half an hour. Next thing we know, a Russian guy pulls up in a silver Volvo station wagon (with painted red lug nuts on all four wheels, odd I would notice this, but it was so tacky looking) and asks about the fishing. Say its no good. Then he shuts off his car and asks if we wish to buy fishing rods and reels. Only $20-30. Huh? He opens his hatch and he has about a dozen rods and reels. Some used only once he says. What is going on here? So eventually I take off before things get more weird. Once I got to 144th street, there was Dave N with his pickup waiting for me. He knew I was too stubborn to accept the ride earlier, but suddenly there was my savior. Man my feet were sore!!!

After coming back from the Bahamas, I had the impression that people out there are much nicer. Well Omaha is slowly changing my mind. While walking through Standing Bear, an older couple and their dog offered me a ride home with my bike. He said he had a van that I could just throw my bike in. I said thank you for the offer and kept walking. The two couples that were fishing just talked it up with my like we were old pals from the neighborhood. And then Dave N was kind enough to come get me and even feed me a beverage. Thanks Dave N! I owe you many.

Must have been thousands of ants moving house. Saw this a couple times while walking home.

So I pulled this "stick" out of the tube and tire. Pointy on one side, blunt on the end sticking out. What luck. I have a new innertube in my garage for my fatbike, a 120tpi one even. I'll throw that on and attempt to fix up my Endo. Not a huge gaping hole, just a break in the rubber. Probably patch up the old tube and just keep it as an emergency spare. Need to order a new tire, might as well. Especially for next winter. But man, those things are $150 a tire! More than my car tires!